Tuesday, April 30, 2013

Cute Office Assistant for Hire

Cute Office Assistant for Hire

My office assistant has "resigned" from her job, and I'm helping her to find a new place of work.

Experience:
2012: Vocal Tracking on Daughters of Bluegrass Pick It Like a Girl (at 5 weeks old)
2012: Mixing Assistant on Rebecca Frazier When We Fall
2013: Vocal Coaching/Guitar Tech for Rebecca Frazier
2013: Efficiency Expert for Rebecca Frazier

Her salary started at $15/hour, but I told her that due to her recent decline in productivity, she may have to work for a little less than that. 

Actually, let me be a little more honest. If you are to go into business with her, you should know a few things:

-When I asked her to change my strings, she drooled on them and made a mess
-Rather than coaching my guitar practice as in the past, she began pulling on my leg and eventually knocked my metronome off the desk.
-She ate leaves off of my office plants.
-She continually risks her life for no apparent reason (for ex., crawling to the top of the stairs)
-She does not watch calmly while I e-mail, as in the past. She finds e-mail very annoying, actually.

That said, I'd be willing to let her go for a discount: $10/hour.

Skills:
String Arranging
Working knowledge of Nashville Number System
Singing the Alphabet Song

Still reading? OK. I realize the market is flooded with Resumes right now. I will actually offer to pay YOU if you are able to work with her for a few hours a day. 

Smiles guaranteed. :-) 


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